Everyone Is Doing It (cont'd)

I kind of thought that this would be easier. I thought that I had essentially just paid $59.95 (plus the cost of hours of online "shopping") for a shiny new boyfriend. It's just not the case.

After about two weeks of searching, judging, reading, looking, judging and projecting my own happily-ever-after fantasies on the maximum number of men match.com would let me view, I got a real bite.

His name was cryptic, his email title was creative, his eyes were dark and captivating. We met up for dinner in my neighborhood, which turned out to be his also. His house was right on my daily walking/running route, and I hadn't known I'd been running right past him every day. I thought, "What a sweet story to tell our grandkids." He's a lawyer. He fights for social rights. He's passionate, sarcastic and funny.

Four dates, a makeout sesh, a concert and an invitation to one of his big public hearings later, he disappeared into thin air. No answer to the last text, no follow-through with weekend plan making. There he was, gone. I called every single one of my close friends, my mom and my brother and recounted the story over and over. I cried and went over every possible thing I could have done to make him evaporate. They all tried to convince me that it wasn't my fault and that he was probably just a jerk (or a eunich, in the case of my imaginative mother.)I took their advice and kind words and stored them in the back pocket of a pair of jeans I knew I wouldn't wear for weeks. I was down. I was sure it was hopeless, that I would most likely never find anyone reliable and honest who would also want to allow me their undying devotion and attention. It was the proverbial hangover that the otherwise joyful tonic that is vodka leaves behind.

Then, as quickly as it all happened, it was over! I remembered that it had only been three weeks since I had enrolled in givemeloveimmediatelyordie.com, and I had only even known the guy for two weeks! I realized that not only did I overreact and slather him in girlfriend vibes, I led myself to believe that I knew him well and that we were really good for each other. Like the relief of untying a stubborn knot, I had actually figured it out. I scared the shit out of him and he straight up ran away. It was a matter of survival for the poor soul.

I knew I'd step into the next date-tionship a little calmer and a little wiser. No need to rush things. I knew I'd keep in mind that I don't really know these men, no matter how many times I read (between the lines) their profiles and pour over their photos. I got back on the horse, and winked my little heart out all over that site.

I had a date in less than a week.

....stay tuned.....